I always had best friends, though I never knew it nor had I asked for you. But I always considered you best friends because you were the only friends I had and so, I treasured your company, along with the happy memories they gave me.

I always valued your company above anything else because everyone, from my parents to my neighbours, told me that finally, when I looked back on life, I would have only two kinds of people left, good friends and family. So, I tried, tried my level best, to see the goodness in you, forgive your mistakes and try and accept you as you appeared. I expected you to be my best friends or rather I expected you to fulfill what my grandfather used to tell me about best friends,”Best friends are one soul in two different bodies.”

I agree, I was never as cool or outgoing or ‘chilled out’ as your other friends, but again, I expected you to accept me as who I am. Maybe, I was wrong.

I never failed to help you whenever I could, but maybe I over did it. I never failed to reply to your messages, but again, maybe I over did it. You taught me that silence is more painful and more punishing than the worst rebuke.

I prized your opinion and criticism but then again, maybe I was wrong.

I never asked you to ignore your other friends and be only my friend, but then you decided to ignore me. Even when we had a hangout after many months, and we happened to bump into some of ‘your’ best friends and my worst enemies, I never asked you to leave them and move on, but I sat there with a painful smile plastered on my face knowing that you would have more fun with them, than you would ever have in the time you spent with me. I never complained, I never berated you, but then I hoped you would understand what went through my mind. But you didn’t.

But even after all this, I must thank you for one thing, for teaching me how a friend shouldn’t be.

(P.S. Finally, I promise that I would never ask you to read any more posts from me, not because I have many other great readers, but because, I can’t bear you going further away. )


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